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Friday, December 11, 2009


These thoughts have been festering inside me for a while..
excuse if theyre out of wack lol.

For the past year or so,
I've come to have a better understanding of the importance of looking at things from other people's perspectives. I had come to quietly pride myself in this quality (not like a "HA i'm so much better than you ignorant people!" pride, just like an accomplishment pride), and it has become to come to my attention more often lately that just because i'm able to think this way, and that i think its a great way to be, doesnt mean everyone else likes to hear about it, or to feel as if they are wrong for not thinking this way.

I have a big mouth...and for some reason feel as if i should stick up for the side of the other person that is not there to defend themself (in said argument or face off). I suppose i need to begin working on keeping my mouth shut...keeping others points of view to myself..and only to voice my own if completely necessary.

For example,
a while back, a friend of mine was giving a waitress a really hard time. It was getting late, and I figured she had been there a reasonable amount of time already. I was sure she was tired. I was sure that she wasnt exactly thrilled to get the table filled with teenagers that were loud, and probably wouldnt tip well. Taking all this into consideration, I tried my best to be very nice to her, even though she was very slow. So when my friend made a big deal over this, and kept complaining and giving her heck, I took it upon myself to try and force him to look at things from her point of view.

I have also done similar to my boyfriend COUNTLESS times, leaving him to belief that i'm never on his side. How can i be when i'm constantly trying to vouch for someone else? (I AM always on his side, i just know the previous thought i what he must be thinking. sorry sweet heart! )

This, i realize, doesnt usually go over well - good intentions or not.

I'm just always thinking of how hard that waitresses life might many babies she has to many bills she has to pay..
thinking of how that weird girl's thoughts really what they say really does hurt her feelings, just like it wouldve hurt them..
thinking of how that guy is just insecure..and doesnt know how to stand up for himself, but he really wants he might have never had a dad to show him how?

As much as i hate to...I realize i need to just learn to control myself, and not try and force people into my way of thinking, be it the best way or not!!

Ya get me?

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